Michael Carducci presents: The Influential Engineer permalink

Attendees:

Presenter: Michael Carducci

20 years exp, magician
twitter: @MichaelCarducci
email: michael@mago.co
Most useful skills weren’t technical/developer skills - skills he learned as a musician
Mentalism: using five senses to create illusion of a sixth sense;
THere is a science to persuasion
Our jobs are to sling code. Or effectiveness is the stuff around it.
We have to lead a team, even if not in a leadership role.
Even in highly technical fields, only 15% is due to one’s technical knowledge, the other 85% is the ability to lead
Persuasion is a skill
People aren’t rational
Ask for a $200 upgrade; management said no

success is going to go to those who can make their case well.
Make your case optimally
- Given two options present the more costly or less costly first
- better to tell mgmt what they will save or what they will lose
- if you have a new info, when should you mention it is new
- if your idea has both strengths and weaknesses
the goal is not to change opinions
the goals it to affect behavior

Reals skills to use on Monday

Understanding people - maslow’s hierachy of needs

Universal Principles of Influence

I am obligated to give back to you the form of behavior that you first give to me (Dr Robert Cialidini?)
Is it ethichal to do something for someone and then call it later?
- yes, necessary for society to function
- Future obligation for repayment of favors gives ua group a tremendous cometitive advantage
Don’t fumble this; stay until all stories are done;
If someone does you a favor, don’t answer: “no problem” “just doing my job” or “it was nothing”
- instead, “Absolutely, I know that if the situation were reversed, you’d do the same for me.”
- Don’t give away the favor that they owe you back
- reinforces the natural human tendency for reciprocation and natural self-belief that one is good
- “Of course, I know it’s important that this gets done; I know that if I needed something you’d be there for me.”
If this is always happening, they may feel entitled
Reciprocity works in negotiations too!
- Do it right away.
- “While you’re here, I need X, do you think you can help me out?”
Always start with the larger request
Retreat back to what you were after all along
We usually do the opposite - start with the smaller one.
Give them a chance to say Yes
- iF they do, great!
- if they say no, fall back to more moderate request
Need to come back with the more moderate request right away!
- If you take time to think about it, it’s perceived as a separate request and not as a concession as part of a negotiation

If you retreat from the situation, you lose. If you retreat in the sitiation, you win.

Dr. R. Cialidini

If you want to create a presuasive argument:

You need to explain what it is about this that they can’t get anywhere else
Managers weigh information about ponetial losses more heavily than information about potential gains
Tell them what they want to hear
“Milage Runs” are a great example
- Uber to Des Moines w/hotel, gas, red bull for driver less expensive than flight to des moines
Scarcity works for information too

People are more likely to say yes when they see other people doing the same thing

It helps to know where the resistence is coming from
Example: we want to use this new javascript framework
- Show consensus in the industry
- Google trends

People live up to what they write down

Present an idea, “so what do you all think about this”
- first person to speak out is going to tip it one way or another
- get osemone

If an expert says it, it must be true!

Realize that you are the expert.
If you are paid to do something, you are an expert.
Junior expert vs senior expert.
You might be the most junior expert on a team of experts, but you are an expert on a team of experts and you should carry yourself as such.

Establishing expertise

Background
Trustworthiness
- How do you show trustworthiness if they don’t know you?
- Lead with a weakness in your case
- Hey I wish I had a perfect solution for you, all we do is the best with what we have, there’s a real drawback to our approach, here it is
- Establishes as knowledgable enough about the pros and cons and honest enough to bring the cons to the surface

People prefer to say yes to those they know and like

You can’t win an argument

A person convinced against their will, will be of the same opinion still.

Dale Carnegie

Persons in an argument leave more convinced they’re right

Begin in a friendly way
Get the other person saying “Yes” immediately
- Hey, you want to make sure we’re productive right?….Then ramp up questions to the one you want to ask.
Dramatize your ideas
- tell a story - don’t just stick to the data
- demonstration trumps explanation
Listen to other ideas - don’t contradict
- at least hear the idea out
Appeal to nobler motives
- Resort to higher authority
- Boss: “I like this idea, but it’s not up to me.”
- Employee: “When you present this to them, you will give it your full support and recommendation, right?”
- Boss: “Yeah, sure…”
Don’t argue & criticize
Try to honestly see things from other people’s perspective
Admit when you’re wrong
- no body cares
Be a good listener
- Ask more questions than statements

DBA = “Don’t Bother Asking”